KEEPIN IT SZELE

Christina Szele - if you look up the word "badass" in the dictionary...  you will find a picture of a badass, getting beat up by Christina Szele


so, this woman got on a flight from new york to san francisco and a flight attendant sees her waiting on the line for the bathroom holding a cigarette and matches (nice covert move, lady) so the crew confiscates her cigarette and matches. but ah-ha! homegirl's got a stash, so when she gets back to her seat, she's on some "fuck it" type shit and just lights one up like she's chillin in a lazy-boy at grandma's house. probably reclined the seat and threw on one of them inflatable neck pillows, too. so the crew sends over another guy who snatches her smoke...

ooooh boy, now you did it, buddy. homegirl apparently spazzed the fuck out and started threatening to kill the dude (all while peppering her commentary with some super racist shit). and it gets better. they tie the woman up (because you know, ever since 9/11, airlines are prepared to tie people up) BUT this chick and her super human racist strength busts out of the flex-cuffs  (those little plastic things that tidy up the extension chord on your blender) and she punches dude in the face!

ok, but that's not even the best part. the best part of this story is that she gets arrested and shows up in court and BLAMES the airline for giving her three drinks. THREE drinks. she says she doesn't even remember having a smoke or punching anyone. after THREE drinks. if you ever gave this woman some tequila, she would probably go down on a rhino and then the next day, you'd tell her, "holy shit, you had some tequila and went down on a rhino!" and she'd be all like, "pffff, yeah right, get outta here... what kind of freak who can't handle her liquor does that?"