i explode
2009-05-22 8:36AM / 標準BLOG
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rarely rarely in the name of work....will I explode......but i did today.
My functionality drops down to 0 due to an incident.
My stomach was so empty , i was hungry, i do know I have to eat....
Mc Donalds.....those kinds ....i was that hungry.....i drove past the place....
I can t....i just keep on driving.........along with my hunger.
Something inside had overided my hunger.
NOt anger tho.....Life in general.....situations.
I finally drove my car bk home.
Instead of comfort food.....I liked to get myself some good food like grilled seabass or something, it is such a beautiful day....relatively hot........but it's evening.....the sun was setting.
I chose to walk.....around my neighour there are full of patios and cafes...
filled with people....I went thru restaurants....cant stoop for food either.........
pass by starbucks.....entered but got out............
people paasses by me i passes by people....dogs kids...babies...
ICE CREAM, i need to eat an icecream....a Madycasga Vanilla Gelato.
That is what i ordered...waffle cone....1 scoop....and then i walked bk
with that cone in my hand..........my mind is still empty....tired....
why would i be so upset....so hard to describe....
I fisnihed.....it's funny how sugar and certain sweetness can ease one's mind.
I leaned against my car.....staring into the air........
It must have someone I cared so much as friends....
didnt even know they were all relying on how others efforts....
everyone has to work hard for them.....
yet they still didnt take the littlest responsibilty in fulfilling their own requriement
did u know anyone who rather let others carry the weight....
not only that....they dont even appreciate what they got with so little effort given in.......
I exploded.
Letting them kknow they are the reasons why others are suffered....
took advantage of others virtues of silence.....
my limit is reached.
The explosion lasted 40 min.
Regreted.........well...not at the time.
I just need to get away........
but the fact..i have to go back and face the same situations......
after the ice cream...the quiet the walk.........
I called to ask for forgiveness on my explosion...my attitude........
there's nothing to support my explosion......
and I apologise for my failing behaviour.
But i did stress the facts at the same time.
this is my report of this explosion.
what a day.....should i stay at a place where my whole person is kind of detoriating...
yet i do know i was placed for a specail reason in here.
I have to hang on.
Cant afford too long.
not suiscidel
take care everyone........
explosive j
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