Days after she left

If you ask me how I am feeling, I might look at you and just smile. I received Etchy's invitation email to go to Live n Loud concert, I thought.... this might just be what I needed. I'll talk about the concert in my next blog. On way back from Asia World Expo, a friend called, honestly, I already fell asleep on the airport express probably coz I was too emotionally tired (part of my job! Looking "I FEEL GREAT!" when I don't -esp after Yai Yai died and I got all these un-necessary suggestions or comments like "Bloody forget that thing and go buy yourself another 2. Honestly, sincere condolesence is what I needed more, or you may say, what I hoped for more and for that, I wanna thank the AND friends for their sweet messages, I really appreciate you all). They were going to get supper (they were at the concert too, the only difference was I left early, i.e after the fourth band performed because I was tired, they left coz they thought the last band had performed. That was something to laugh about :P) I went to join them but as you all know.... I am ON diet. So I just sat there.... basically blank. Nothing was on my mind, we talked a little bit about the music. Then I went home. When I got home... I ALMOST went straight to bed (after shower) but I pulled myself up to charge my mobile. GUESS WHAT? I LOST IT. I have never lost my mobile apart from one time when it was stolen from my school bag back in the US. Which means, at least from year 2000 I have compiled a list of names and numbers in my phone that were so large, they couldn't be saved in SIM CARDs (trust me,  I do housekeeping on my contacts once or twice a year but still it was HUGE). I was thinking about photographs and messages and the contact lists....

Have I transfered the photos? NO. I had a lot self-portraits in it. I even have pics from uni in the phone (2GB memory, no music files, you can imagine). Thank God I dun use that phone to take pics of Xu Xu if not I'd really be upset to lose the pics. any funny messages? I dun care, but none I can think of. Contact lists? I am more concerned about work contacts. coz hey..... if I dun change my number, "real" friends will still "one day" contact me. For the first time.... well.... maybe I exaggerated.... but in real RARE occasions did I lose something and remained so calm. O, btw, I called 999, taxi lost and found, 1083, radio stations for lost and found. You won't believe how calm I was. The next thing I said to myself, "well, it's late now... I am going to bed". O.... it was a new phone too, only 2 weeks old. What I am trying to say is that.... sometimes... things happen in life, I dunno whether by chance or coincidence or by fate, yet, I literally am convinced it felt like "forced upon me" house-cleaning. A lot of changes took place this year (like the parts in old clocks starting to move and thus cause movement on the needles) but I was always burdened with the past, especially the past 7-8 years. Losing that phone was like the universe suddenly just took a shovel and swept away my memory of the the past 8 years. Clean and clear. Should I be thankful? no... I want to write... shouldn't I be thankful?

And you know what's more? HK had Signal 8 Thunder Storm yesterday. To me, it was like HE gave me a GOOD BLOODY whole day to dwell on it coz basically all my appointments and work was cancelled. It's like Him saying to me "NOW, you have one whole day to think about what happened! AND PLEASE DO come up with a good conclusion in the end! Dun tell me you are going to be busy today to even think about anything!". Losing things are not fun but I am somehow thankful I did lose my mobile this time. Coz to me, mobile might be the closest thing to me apart from my underwear. i.e I sleep with it. I feel it's time to start anew.

UPDATES ON MY OTHER 2 BABIES:

XUXU: still his old self, acting like a tribal king

Guai Guai: avoid being at places she used to cuddle up with Yai Yai. They used to sleep together. so, basically.... I think she's depressed.