Fwd: Life Mathematics

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Fwd: Life Mathematics
2008-07-21 11:47AM / 標準BLOG / 會員可以看
10個評論
LIFE MATHEMATICS

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, 'You're next.' They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

BLOG評論 (10)

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Katie_x
留言於2008-07-27 4:55AM [举报]

Haha the last one is so funny but so mean!! LOL
HuisyG
留言於2008-07-26 3:48PM [举报]

I like this! =)
Jaine
留言於2008-07-24 7:50AM [举报]

hmm I shop like a man
musicnote
留言於2008-07-23 8:51AM [举报]

so funny!
AsianChick100
留言於2008-07-22 12:12PM [举报]

haha... the last one is REALLY funny...
peachey
留言於2008-07-22 2:26AM [举报]

Haha. Like the last one a lot.
Yes, love less. I've figured that one out already.
Flagday
留言於2008-07-21 9:09PM [举报]

"You're next." Now that's funny.
janechu
留言於2008-07-21 2:55PM [举报]

hahaa... these are funny... and true... hahaa... =D
Etchy
留言於2008-07-21 1:58PM [举报]

its funny because its true...
shorty
留言於2008-07-21 11:48AM [举报]

LOL!

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RenRen

统计信息

Super straight forward and blunt. I'm the friend that tells you that you look like sh*t at the end of a long day at work (and then I help you fix your hair)...
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Super straight forward and blunt. I'm the friend that tells you that you look like sh*t at the end of a long day at work (and then I help you fix your hair). I can be pretty intimidating, but everyone around me knows that I'm one of the nicest people they'll ever meet. I can talk to anyone, anywhere, on just about anything that comes to my mind at the moment. I'm a Cancer so I can get along with practically anyone. At this moment in life, I can say that the smartest decision I ever made was to study abroad in Hong Kong, where all I did was shop, eat, party, and travel for a year (but don't tell my parents that). I'm super addicted to girly books (I love Sophie Kinsella) and was recently tricked into reading my first romance novel(it's like porn on books). I truly believe that I am destined to be a photographer, food critic, or an event planner, but somehow landed in banking and finance. I'm an impulsive shopper (last year I bought a PSP and now it's just sitting on my book shelf). I have a passion for food and I love trying new restaurants. I once told a friend "if we weren't working together we would never be friends because you can't eat garlic." My friends appreciate food. For some odd reason (I still haven't figured out what) I have the shortest attention span when it comes to the guys I date. I can be staring at my cell phone when it rings, but I'll never pick it up. I'm addicted to buying Chinese DVDs. I'm allergic to lychee, but I eat it anyways. I can't stand pretentious people, I rather respect you for your b*tchy a**hole selves. I learned how to read and speak Mandarin by watching tv. I once told a Congressmen to get off my seat at a conference in capitol hill. I'm not on facebook.

That's all. I think.

Update 8/17/2007...just kidding...I'm on facebook now.
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