Random Sh*t and turning 21

School started this week, so I am extra-horrid busy...

Jan 7, 1988, I was cleaning my room and found a joint. I smoked it. It's the last time I did any drugs. I've been clean for 21 years. I am a statistical impossibility.

Because I live at the confluence (or collision site) of two languages, I spend a lot of time thinking about how to explain English and stuff. I've realized that the real difficult part of English for ESL students, I think, is prepositions. Chinese is so much more direct. I remember when I was in school, they told us that a preposition is "anywhere a mouse can go." So you know what that means? "Up Richard Gere's @ss" is a prepositional phrase.

I'm part of a group of people who do an annual set of awards for Hong Kong films. So I've had to buy a lot of DVDs lately to catch up on what I missed. Last year I missed a lot of movies (inlcuding Lust Caution; I didn't want to risk having to vote for Tony Leung's bozac for Best Supporting Actor Genitalia). So this year I want to be more comprehensive in my choices. But don't worry. The halls of Suck Palace are already full, and I doubt anything I watch now can dislodge some of the utter junk I've already seen.

I'm also in the midst of a small, semi-private film festival that involves catching all the latest local releases (some of which are eligible for the 2008 awards), so I will watch at least 4 movies in theatres this week. That will be nice.

My new Japanese guitar is great. So is my new Japanese friend. But you knew that.

Ong Bak 2 is another in a long line of Thai action movies that are better without subtitles, even though I saw it with subs. I seriously hope that young people who watch it realize that they are seeing their generation's Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee; Tony Jaa's physical ability is utterly astounding and I respect him not only for the risks he takes but for delivering such sheer entertainment. His films promote their own DVD sales because you know you want to see it again to be sure you really saw what you think you saw.

Definition of pathetic and dumb: a middle-aged man who  spends an hour on a treadmill for no other reason than his favorite tomboy is working at the gym while he is there and he doesn't want to seem like a girly man (in front of the manly girl) and nearly cripples himself in an incredibly vain attempt to impress a woman who probably likes women only slightly less than he himself does.

This is the same jackass who actually lost 10 pounds in Japan because he walked around so much and ate only what he could find at 7-11.

When you get on the scale and it says 244# and you feel svelte, you's a big motherf#$%er...

I like cold weather, because I sleep better. When I am not sleeping alone, I really like cold weather because I tend to be warm all the time and that is something women seem to really apprecaite, to the point that they don't even sound mad when they wake up to ask me "What are you doing back there?" and I tell them that it is a scientific fact that if you put your underwear around your ankles it will keep your whole body warm, and if they reach behind them they will see that I already did it and just feel how warm I am...

No wonder I'm sleeping alone, huh?