friends

hmm... feeling a little light-headed... so if this entry sounds confusing, it's probably me... and not you... hahaa...  anyhoo... trying to fight off the signs of a cold...  it's been a pretty bad half a year for me... health-wise... hopefully I'll be okay when I get to HK... *crossing my fingers AND toes*

after reading AC100's blog to her girls made me think a lot about my friends... remember my blog about surprise parties? I still have a group picture from that trip (surprise birthday trip to San Diego) on my desk... today, I walked by and just stopped and looked at the picture... *sigh* I told myself, maybe it's time to change that picture? why? b/c there are 6 of us in the pic... and most of us aren't really friends anymore... I still have contact with 3 of them... but remember in a post I said that two of them don't want to be friends anymore... J and S... so... *sigh* it seems like I am still friends with them.. but they are not friends among themselves...

almost every year I tell myself that this year, I'm gonna work on strengthening my friendship... but it seems like I can never do a good job on it... maybe b/c I'm the type of person who doesn't like to phone people... I guess you can call me lazy... or maybe that's just an excuse... I know my friends are busy... well, more busy than me... they're working... or have school... so I feel like calling them may be bothering them... I always think about them... wanting to call, but usually I just end up not calling...   I guess I just need to keep working on it...

but I'm glad that I came upon AnD and started blogging... it's a great place to write my thoughts... and a good place for laughs too... hehee... I remember in Heart of Greed, Alfred (played by Ray Lam) once said in the series that when a person is down, the thing they want to do most is to write down all the sad things... it's kinda true, don't you think? I found AnD to be a good place to just write about anything... anything you'd want people to see...

lately, I've been getting a lot of friend requests (which I feel really honored about)... but I've rejected the requests... I want to apologize to all those I've rejected... it seems the staff of AnD really makes an emphasis on the Friend vs. Fan thing... a lot of people find it weird to be/have a fan... maybe "fan" is not a good word... maybe that needs to be changed... what's a better word for that if we're not artists?

anyway... I feel guilty for rejecting the requests... feel like a bad person... but maybe I should accept the requests to all the people who always read my blog, right? hmm... I just want to apologize to those who I've rejected... really, I am sorry... but maybe one day I will add you as a friend (to all those I've rejected)...   Thank You to all my readers... I've found good virtual space...