Hair, hair and more hair!!!!

So I've a hair issue. Of course I'm not the type that knows anything about styling hair or make up cuz I don't do it. I'm not that big on being girlie girl. Call me a tom boy if you'd wish.

FRIZZZ! I deal with it alot. When my hair is down it's like a pyrmid. My hair isn't that bad I've seen worse. It's not dry or treated badly at all. I don't put it through heat and stuff either. It's tied up in a pony tail or bun most of the time. Thick hair might I add.

I don't know how to make it manageable to where I can wear my hair down. I do want it to be straight and sleek and stuff. But it seems impossible, even with a flat iron. Irons will make it damaged so I've heard. That'll just make it look bad.

Tips???

Oh and using different shampoo doesn't help either. I used Doved, Panteen Pro V, Sun Silk, etc.... doesn't change much of anything really.

Any idea on what products to use to make it look better? Hair Spray, Gel, Mouse????? I don't know anything about that stuff.

Call me stupid but I was raised to not use this stuff.